walking around in tap shoes and pyjamas since 2010 - my cycling log (opens in new window)

Friday, May 14, 2010

Cycling: It's Great for Your Physique!

You may think most male cyclists keep their hair short because it's simply more practical — it's cooler under your helmet, and if you ride to work and work doesn't provide showers, you can just sprinkle some water over your head, run your hands through it, and you're pretty much good.

In fact, it's to prevent scenarios like the one I'm about to illustrate.

SETTING:
A sidewalk next to an office building in a busy urban business district. A long-haired cyclist is locking his bike, having just arrived at work.

BYPASSER 1: WOOOOIE! (Ed: How does one transliterate a cat call?)
beat
BYPASSER 2: (chuckling) Yeah -- he's got a nice a** ... but he's kinda fat for a hoss.

Friends of Bypasser 1 laugh.

EXUENT all but cyclist. Cyclist looks bemused.

END OF SCENE

As for me, I'm not sure whether I'm flattered or insulted*. Kinda fat for a hoss? Well, I never! (Okay, so it's true; as cyclists go, I am definitely a middleweight — not the biggest guy on the block by any stretch, but far from skinny.)

On the other hand, maybe it is time for a haircut.


*It should be noted that I'm pretty sure the bypassers were laughing at their buddy for accidentally scoping out a dude, and not at me for being less svelte than certain other cyclists. Likewise, it was good-natured ribbing, not harsh jeering.

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